sunshine0221's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Doomed Doomed I hardly ever watch live TV anymore, because of my best friends Ti and Vo of course, but was flipping through the channels for a few minutes the other day and watched a few minutes of The Nanny. It was the episode where Fran is leaving Mr.Sheffield , because after six years he still seems to be unable to make a commitment. Fran talks about it with her psychiatrist, and has a big huge epiphany that she has been recreating her relationship with her father over and over again in her relationships with men. Of course, since this is a sitcom, she tells Mr. Sheffield that she is leaving, and he sweeps her into his arms, and kisses her, and commits, and everyone lives happily ever after � until the series gets cancelled anyway. Back to real life now. I am kinda doing the same thing in my life. I got a message from my dad on my answering machine yesterday. And he sounded so old. And I am feeling so bad that I am not nearer to him so I can help, and make sure that he�s okay. And then I felt even sadder because he was not around when I was growing up. And as far as I know, did not spend a millisecond feeling bad about it, or thinking of me. If I had the time and the money I would go spend some time with him now. He had both and chose not to. I swear I am not throwing a pity party here - it�s just hitting me that that�s the way my relationships tend to go. I listen, and care, and try to be there for them, but when it comes to dudes being there for me � not so much. I am hoping that now that I have been whacked on the head by the anvil of not-so-good-relationships, my luck will change. Although, not to be whiny or anything, the geezers at the thrift store have started seriously hitting on me again. Hey relationship gods � just to make things clear � no grandpas � kay? 12:15 p.m. - March 24, 2003 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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