sunshine0221's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Things That Make Me Go Eeek! Things That Make You Go Eeek! I had a bat in the house the other night. I was awakened by a commotion, which I assume was the bat gaining entry to my bedroom, Probably through a hole the size of a tic tac. I then got to hang out under the covers while listening to the sound of wings flapping. And then the bat sat on me. Major freakage ensued, and I ran to the bathroom and peeked out the door as every once in a while I caught a glimpse of a flying object out of the corner of my eye. I finally ended up making a run for my mom's house (next door) and tried unsuccessfully to get back to sleep. I am especially jumpy about noises in my bedroom ever since the r-a-t incident. A few years ago, I was sleeping, and I heard footsteps walking across my bedroom floor. Not scurrying, freaking footsteps. At first I thought it was Sunshine, my doggie, and then I heard two distinct sets of footsteps. To recap, two sets of footsteps, one my dog, one not my dog. The not-my-dog walked right past Sun. Sun was pretty calm about it which makes me suspect it was probably an attractive female non-dog. Yes I totally freaked, I don't think my feet touched the ground as I ran for cover, and after a week of hearing noises and not sleeping, the Guy Who Catches Animals In Your House was summoned. He said we needed to determine what the animal was. Now, maybe it's just me, but at that point I really didn't care what it was, I just wanted it to stop partying in my bedroom. The plan was to put a cut up plastic trash bag in the middle of bedroom with flour sprinkled on it and some kind of animal treat right in the middle. This way, the animal would leave flour tracks and the Guy Who Catches Animals could determine what exactly we were dealing with here. So I did the trash bag thing, and the next day (have I mentioned I was sleeping at mom's house?) I went in to check on it. There was no flour. There was no trash bag. There was no critter bait. At this point I realized we were dealing with some kind of super-animal, and that whatever it was, it needed to be gone. Right. Freaking. Now. Before it took over the world. Or ate Sunshine. So, Catching Animals Dude came over, set a huge trap, and that evening while I was talking with a friend on the phone, I heard a big, loud snap. When my friend asked me why I was shrieking, I told him what had just happened, and he, being a guy, said, "Oh cool! Go look and see what it is!!� Me, being a sane person, informed him that there was nothing on heaven or earth that could make me even consider going into my bedroom to "look". The next day Animal Dude came over, and it was a huge r-a-t. Who is now thankfully (for me, not him) frolicking in r-a-t heaven. I had the Dude who Fixes House Stuff come and block off the rat superhighway that ran through my bedroom. So far so good. Although it was months before I was brave enough to sleep in my bedroom again. The latest "things that make you go eek" incident all began when I decided that I needed some kind of neck like display for my jewelry. I have been noticing that pictures of necklaces lying flat don't have the impact of necklaces on a neck. I mentioned to my mom, the shopping queen, that I was going to order a necklace display. She said, "Don't order anything! They have mannequin torsos at the Bargain Box!� If there were ever words that I did not expect to ever hear from my mom, I believe that, "They have mannequin torsos at the Bargain Box!" would be at the top of that list. So I ran over to the Bargain Box and got the last mannequin torso. I'm a little disturbed that the other one sold so quickly. I mean, I have a legitimate purpose for my mannequin torso. Who knows what kind of freaky pervert bought the other one? My mannequin is bald and has no arms, but damn, my necklaces look good on her. I named her Cordelia. So far, so good. Except for the fact that every time I walk past Cordelia I scream because - oh my gawd - there is someone in the house. Now I understand my startlement the first few times she surprised me. You would think that after three days, and innumerable shrieks, I would have gotten used to having a bald, armless mannequin torso on my dining room table. Nope. As a matter of fact, just now I went to get a glass of water and I once again screamed when I saw her. But at least she's not a r-a-t. 10:43 p.m. - June 20, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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